A Different Kind of Gift
Katelyn Williamson, Director of Youth and Family Ministry
12/8/22
For the past five years, almost every summer, I’ve taken some junior high and senior high friends on a backpacking trip. On the first of these adventures, our guides for the week started a tradition that has continued each year. At the beginning of the hike, they passed around a bag of M&M’s. Each camper took a few, leaving enough so the bag could make it all the way around the circle. Once the M&M’s were divided out, the guides asked everyone to count and report how many they took. The guides then shared that over the course of the week, while stopping for meals on the trail, each person would get a chance to share one memory or milestone—one M&M—for each of the M&M’s taken from the bag. Over the course of the next six days, each of us was gifted an hour to share about any memories and milestones that had shaped our lives. It was powerful to watch others let their guards down and take off their masks. Part of being human is longing to be known.
I recently read my journal from a trip we took a few years ago. I’d written down notes on what some of the youth had shared. Underneath my friend Sean’s name, four things were written. Sean’s Memories and Milestones: The times I’ve made my mom cry, the year my dad coached my team and was proud of me, when only one friend showed up at my eighth-grade birthday party, and when I got hurt my junior year and couldn’t play ball. What a gift it is to get a front-row seat as another person pulls the cover off their heart and hesitantly, but bravely, shows it off, in all its mess and glory. In those holy moments, strangers somehow become siblings. Isn’t that what we all long for? To be listened to and loved. To be treated like family.
After Jesus listened to the bleeding woman’s story, he called her daughter. He made sure she knew that she wasn’t rejected but that she absolutely belonged. Jesus wants to call you his child, too.
Praying with Zach
Katelyn Williamson, Director of Youth and Family Ministry
11/21/22
When Jesus reached the spot, he looked up and saw the man and said, ‘Zacchaeus, hurry up and come down. I must be your guest today.’” (Luke 19:5 PHILLIPS)
Question: Who is the most popular cultural icon among your peers? A musician? An athlete? A social media influencer? Picture that person walking into the halls of your school tomorrow. What would happen? Would they get swarmed by students for selfies? That’s what it was like for Jesus. His public appearances turned into pop-up parades. Today’s story centers around another person who longed to get close to Jesus, but he had to figure out how to navigate the crowd. His name was Zacchaeus. I bet his friends called him Zach. That is, if he had any friends. Zach was a tax collector by trade, the most despised job in town. The Romans had conquered the Jews and bribed Zach to turn against his own people. His job was to go door-to-door with Roman soldiers and demand that his neighbors send a percentage of their income to Caesar in Rome. But tax collectors were known for up-charging everyone, becoming rich by stealing from their own community.
Scripture: Turn in your Bible to Luke 19:1–10.
Read it slowly and underline anything that catches your eye. Read the first five verses for a second time and then share your wonderings.
My Wonderings: I wonder how short Zach really was? I wonder . . . I wonder . . . I wonder . . . I wonder how Jesus actually saw Zach. I did a Google Image search of “sycamore trees” and they look like big pieces of broccoli. They have so many leaves that it would have been easy for Zach to stay hidden under cover. I wonder if Jesus was the only one who even noticed him hiding in the tree. Maybe you feel like that sometimes. Like no one ever notices you. You try your best to get bigger numbers on report cards, social media posts, and in the weight room. And smaller numbers on the scale. But sometimes you mess up on purpose, just to get someone’s attention. Many of my teenage friends are asking the question “Does anyone see me?”
Below are some actual statements my friends have posted on their social media accounts:
I’m screaming at the top of my lungs, and no one even turns their head. I hate when my mom talks about how awesome my brother and sister are. #IFeelLikeCrapNow. Try walking a mile in my shoes, then you can yell at me for not being perfect. OK, I’m bored. What should I pierce? I wish I believed I was worth loving. I wasted my childhood trying to grow up. Leave it to me to always mess everything up. I told my mom I’m depressed and can’t do my homework cause I’m emotionally damaged. She believed me and is taking me to the doc. LOL Crying because I’m so exhausted and I want to sleep, but I can’t because I have so much work. Emotionally . . . I’m done. Mentally . . . I’m drained. Spiritually . . . I feel dead. Yet physically . . . I smile.
One of my high school friends sent me this message recently:
Kate, last night . . . it hit the fan, and I mean hard. Everything was going good and then my mom had the great idea to start the timeless argument about how I don’t care about school. She called me downstairs and logged into the parent portal to check my grades . . . they were bad. I had pretty much given up hope this year. As the argument continued, I found myself falling into a pit of deep-seated hatred and anger for my parents. They just don’t get it, I thought. I punched my wall, ’cause that’s what kids do in movies and stuff, but it kinda hurt, and I didn’t feel any better. My dad is so angry. He took away all my stuff. My phone, my laptop, my friends, my driving privileges for, as he said, “the entire summer.” He even told my mom to take away all my clothes except for two pairs of shorts, two shirts, two pairs of socks, and one pair of shoes. He said my life is going to be like the military. We are talking about waking up early, doing chores and yard work every day this summer. This is the worst ever. My parents just don’t get what I’m going through. They don’t understand my emotions. I feel like nobody understands me. I have lost touch with God. I’m stupid, worthless, scrawny, ugly, too skinny, no girlfriend, and living for no reason. My parents came in to say good night to me and told me they were sorry, but they did it ’cause they love me. When they said “Goodnight, love you,” all I could mumble was, “I wish the feeling was mutual.”
Do you ever feel like that? Like no one truly gets you, like no one understands you, like no one sees you? Jesus. Jesus sees you. Just like he saw Zach hiding in that tree. But how would you know if Jesus was looking at you right now? You would have to look at him in order to really know, right? Your eyes would need to meet his. So how do we do that? How do we turn our eyes towards Jesus? The Message translation of Luke 19:3–4 says, “[Zach] wanted desperately to see Jesus, but the crowd was in his way . . . so he ran on ahead and climbed up in a sycamore tree so he could see Jesus.” Maybe we do the same thing Zach did. If we desperately want to see Jesus, maybe we figure out how to escape the chaos of the crowd and climb up a tree. How is “the crowd” distracting you? Could it be the notifications constantly buzzing in your pocket? Is it a constant fear of missing out? What if the distractions are keeping us from missing out on the one thing we want to see most? Jesus. Can anything compare to looking into the eyes of God and seeing that he is looking back at us?
At the heart of worship is attention. Make a list of things that are distracting you from paying attention to Jesus. Take your time and ask Jesus to reveal to you the things that are keeping you from seeing him. Then, as an act of surrender, write them down. Pray something like, “Jesus, just like Zacchaeus, I desperately want to see you, but I’m distracted. Will you help me turn from my distractions and look toward you?”
Falling in Love with Jesus
Katelyn Williamson, Director of Youth and Family Ministry
9/21/22
I remember going to summer camp right before eighth grade. That was the year I started asking more questions about God. Each night, the camp speaker opened the Gospels and shared stories about Jesus. He told us how getting to know Jesus helps us get to know God. Then, he told us how much Jesus loves us. This frustrated me. Mid-week, I cornered the speaker after his talk and said, “Chris, you’re being really repetitive. We know Jesus loves us. We get it! You can move on. Tell us how we’re supposed to be better people and stuff. You don’t have to keep harping on his love. Tell us what we need to do.” With kindness in his eyes, he leaned against the stage and listened. Then he slowly replied, “Kate, I’m not sure you do get it. When Jesus’ love grabs hold of you, that is what changes you—not a list of ways to be a better person.” I had grown up in the church, heard about Jesus, and called myself a Christian for years, but that was the first time someone had ever made me question if I truly understood Jesus’ love for me. At that moment, I felt incredibly lost.
On the first day of that week, everyone was placed on a team. At the week’s end, the winning team was awarded the cherished “Camp Champ” t-shirts. Points were distributed for winning competitions and performing obnoxious team cheers. There were bonus points for anyone who got up before breakfast and walked around the lake. I wasn’t a morning person, but I loved winning, so I decided I would wake up early every morning and help my team take home the shirts. It was about a half mile around the lake, and you got points for each lap, but the rule was you had to walk, not run. And you had to walk by yourself. And you had to be silent. As an extrovert, I’d never intentionally spent that much time alone or in silence.
This camp was nestled in the North Idaho mountains, and most mornings there was a mist that fell heavy on the lake. Often the fog was so thick I couldn’t see ten feet in front of me. During those mornings I began talking and listening to Jesus in a way I never had before. The morning after that conversation with John, I had a conversation with Jesus. We talked while we walked. “Jesus, I’ve been trying to live ‘the Christian life’ for a long while, and to me, it feels a lot like this competition at camp. The more I behave, the better I perform, the more likely I am to win at this religion thing. The more likely I am to be liked. But after this week and John’s talks, I’m thinking I might be getting the whole thing wrong. I want to understand your love for me, but I honestly don’t know what to do. Jesus, will you help me?” I didn’t hear an audible response from him, but that morning during the final lap around the lake, I experienced Jesus’ presence walking alongside me. I don’t really know how to describe it. All I know is that he answered my prayer and gave me faith to believe that he was with me.
A big part of being a teenager is asking questions. My guess is that, much like young Katelyn, you probably wonder what God is like, if he’s real, and how he feels about you. In the person of Jesus, we get answers to those questions. Jesus Christ reveals God’s heart to us. Since none of us were alive 2,000 years ago when Jesus walked the earth, how do we know what Jesus was like? The same way we know what our great grandparents were like. We listen to stories. And hopefully, you’ll read some stories about you. As you read the stories of Jesus that show us what God is like, read them with your mind because these stories are true. The gospel accounts are factual, historical reports. They were recorded by people who either knew Jesus firsthand or by close companions of people who were eyewitnesses of the risen Christ. But don’t just read them like a textbook. These tales are much more like love stories and action movies. Let your heart get wrapped up in the wonder of God’s love for you. Try to imagine what it felt like to be there 2,000 years ago. In the very presence of Jesus. God with skin on. Imagine being at the wedding when he turned water into wine or in the boat when he calmed the raging storm. When you put yourself in the scene, what do you see? What do you see on the face of Jesus? What do you hear, smell, taste and feel?
In the classic French novel Les Misérables, Victor Hugo wrote, “Le suprême bonheur de la vie, c’est la conviction qu’on est aimé; aimé pour soi-même, disons mieux, aimé malgré soi-même.” The English translation is, “The greatest happiness of life is the conviction that we are loved; loved for ourselves, or rather, loved in spite of ourselves.” God has communicated his love for us in dozens of ways. He reveals it in sunsets, friendships, taste buds, and songs. But if you’ve ever doubted the way God feels about you, there’s nothing more convincing than the person of Jesus. And I am convinced that if you truly get to know him, you can’t help but fall in love with him.
Phone Home
Denise McClellan, Director of Adult Ministries & Missional Service
7/21/22
When I was in college, my dorm room was decorated with movie posters. My sister-in-law worked for a local radio station, and they often promoted movie premieres. She had access to original movie posters for the theaters, and she shared them with me. One of those posters was from E. T. My roommate and I taped it to the wall by the phone. Yes, back in those days, we had a phone hanging on the wall! She thought it was funny to add a sign to the poster that said “Denise Phone Home” because my dad and I talked weekly on that phone. Each Sunday afternoon we’d talk. About the Browns, my aunts, his work, my siblings, the Indians, my grades, the weather. It kept us connected. We continued those weekly Sunday phone calls until he died ten years later, and I’m so glad we did.
The article link below by Deb Koster, an ordained pastor in the Christian Reformed Church, contains some advice for parents sending children off to college. She speaks from experience about how to stay connected and how to adjust guiding your children as they head off on their own. Click the link below to read more.
Wise Words
Shannon Fossett, Director of Children’s Ministries
6/13/22
We don’t say the “s word” at our house. No, not that word. The “s word” I’m having a difficult time saying is senior. Our oldest is going to be a senior, and I can’t believe it! When I think of it, tears of sadness and joy come to my eyes.
Another thing that happens is I think of all the things our son needs to know before he leaves home. Wise Words sometimes come from books, but sometimes they come from the experience of friends. That’s what happened to the author of the article you’ll find a link to below. When her son was senior, a friend shared the wisdom of her experience of how to “foster independence” in your child so that they’re ready to make life decisions. Trust me . . . I’ll be looking back on this article many times over the next months.
Rite of Confirmation
Pastor Thaddeus Book, Associate Pastor
5/18/22
Desert Cross celebrated the Rite of Confirmation on Sunday. Nine of our youth participated. We asked them to write a faith statement that would help them articulate where their faith and lives intersect. Each of them then chose a portion to share with the Congregation during the service. They expressed themselves so well and so beautifully that we wanted to share their words with you. Let’s keep these young people in our prayers as they continue their faith walk.
- I believe there is power in prayer and that God is always listening. I believe you should live with faith every day and set out to do what God has planned.
- I believe that forgiveness is an important part of being a Christian. Jesus forgives our sins because he died on the cross for us. I believe in forgiving people’s mistakes. I believe in forgiving people who hurt you.
- I believe in life after death. I think after death I will ascend to heaven and spend eternity with Jesus. I’m not sure what heaven looks like, but I hope my family and friends that have already passed with be waiting for me.
- Grace is very important to me because it is not only just forgiveness, but it is also eternal love. This is much like how Jesus Christ always told us to love and forgive. Grace is also very important to me because if I show grace, it means I will be following in the footsteps of Christ and his disciples.
- I believe God’s eyes will never fail to see me when I am lost. I believe that God will never ignore my prayers. I believe that God will always sense my presence when I am in need. I believe that God will forever keep me safe and lead me through the desertedness of life. I believe that God will never forget me. I believe I will never forget God.
- I believe in the forgiveness of others. People are going to make mistakes, and if you can’t forgive them for something that they didn’t intend, then what does that make you? Forgiving someone is almost always the right thing to do, often, you never know what they have or are going through and if you judge them for a mistake they have made, maybe you don’t really see the whole story. And it would be wrong for you to judge someone, especially if you don’t understand their situation. Jesus forgave so many people, many of which were great offenses, but it shows you how forgiveness is the right option.
- I believe in service. We should always strive to help others. Through little good deeds, we can make a huge impact on someone’s life. I believe we should always cherish and be kind to everyone around us. Service grows from love and concern for others. I believe God wants us to love and serve others graciously and create a more positive community.
- I believe God helps guide me through life. God pushes me to continue improving and be a better person. With him I am able to make mistakes and learn from them and make good choices. God has taught me to spread my faith through actions. Through my faith I will always try to build good relationships and love others. I hope after confirmation I can be more connected to the community.
- In the verse Proverbs 3:5-6, we are told to, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make straight your paths.” What I believe this is trying to tell us is that we have our faults, we have made decisions that do not act on behalf of God. In these moments of decision and action, this verse is telling us to let go of these faults and rely on the Lord, to rely on love. I believe that God is telling us to love, for he is love, acting inside of us to spread the word to others. Faith is important to me because it teaches me not only what it means to be a member of the church, but how to be one. After my confirmation I will try to follow closer to the teachings of God, letting love guide me.
Guidance & Social Media
Chad Diegle, Director of Youth Ministries
10/14/21
Parents, I know you are acutely aware of the impact that our teens are facing as it pertains to social media, but how do we provide guidance? Our role in shaping our children and their interactions with social media is a role that can feel daunting and nearly impossible to master. My own kids show a proficiency in social media that I can’t even fathom, and I’m the “youth guy” at the church!!! Social media has become one of the core influencers in the life of your teen, and it didn’t even exist 20 years ago. I remember when most of the youth at Desert Cross were just getting their first cell phones, which had no connectivity with the internet or apps, and Tetris was the big distraction during meetings. Here we are two decades later, and an entire crew of elementary kids are rolling around with connections that span our entire globe. News, photos, applications, pornography, videos of violence (sometimes even live) are all in the palm of their hands. Sure, we set some basic guidelines around what they can and can’t do with their phones. We give them a short lecture on the responsibilities that come with wielding this power. I just feel that we can and should offer them more. More instruction, more explanation, more understanding, and more guidance are needed as they learn to navigate the very adult world through their phone. Have you discussed what it means to honor God with their eyes, ears, mouth, and time? I know I didn’t do much of that as I raised my boys. At least not as much as I should have . . . looking back.
The link below is to an article that has some great Biblical perspective on your role in the life of your child’s social media footprint. It’s from Parenting for Faith, the program Desert Cross is offering this year. If you’re interested in learning more about that program, use the second link to our website. Take what you like from the article and know that you are not alone on this parenting journey. I hope you might also consider sharing your ideas with parents around you. My guess is we all could use some insight along our parenting journey.
Parenting for Faith at Desert Cross
Parenting for Faith
Chad Diegle, Director of Youth Ministries
9/15/21
Parenting is tough, really tough. In a recent meeting with the high school youth, I asked a couple questions about parenting. The first was “What is something your parent/s do/does that you do NOT want to do as a parent?”. As you might imagine, this question gets a very wide range of answers. The next question I asked was “What is something your parent/s do/does that you DO want to do when you are a parent?”. Then we talked. A lot. You better believe that I pointed out to the youth that night just how difficult parenting is. I’m not sure they believed me, but I tried!
Parenting is the hardest thing that I have done, at least over a long period of time. If I add the expectation that we, as Christians, have in passing on our faith, then things get even more complicated. Please hear me when I say this: You are not alone. You are not alone in your struggle in finding ways to be a “good parent” and feeling like you are failing. You are not alone in your fear that your child will not adopt this faith that you value and where you have found so much hope, joy, love, and peace.
Desert Cross is working to figure out ways to support you on your parenting journey. Please find the link below to a lesson from the “Parenting for Faith” course we’re offering at Desert Cross. I hope you find a nugget of benefit from reading it. You’ll also find a link to more information about the Parenting for Faith course that begins at Desert Cross September 29.
Parenting for Faith at Desert Cross
Helping Teens Deal with Depression
Chad Diegle, Director of Youth Ministries
8/11/21
May was Mental Health Awareness Month, and I find myself feeling like it needs to be longer than a month! Our teens are at a fairly high risk for many mental health related issues, and sadly I am not sure that most of us feel equipped to offer much help if an issue arises. If you are like me, I imagine there are moments, or phases, where you wonder about the mental health of your teen. Will this pass? Do they need to see a doctor or a therapist? Is this situational, or is there something chemically amiss with my son or daughter? Will I be judged by friends, family, and coworkers? Is this issue treatable?
It is easy to become frozen by our fears, but I pray that fear motivates you, for the sake of your child, to attack the situation. Be their advocate, champion, and most importantly their parent. As we learn more about the science of mental illnesses, we are also learning just how important societal acceptance is as well. I cannot promise that the process of your family’s journey towards healing will be an easy one, but I can assure you that your child is worth the challenge.
The link below is to an article on teen depression. Approximately 1 in 5 youth will experience depression during their teen years. After you read the article, please share it with someone else who might need the link for their child.
Helping Teens Deal with Depression
Changing and Growing as Parents
Chad Diegle, Director of Youth Ministries
7/8/21
We are in the throes of a record setting hot summer, and we’re venturing out from our COVID-19 cocoons. Parents of teens are now being forced to ask themselves what this might mean for their teenage sons and/or daughters. For the past year we knew where they were . . . likely at home. We knew who they were with . . . likely alone or with family. We knew what they were doing . . . okay, that might be a stretch. This change in our environment has caused parents to now face the difficult challenge of parenting their teens through these changes. I found a really good article with some useful tips. They are not from a religious standpoint, but they are golden. My prayer for each of you is that you find ways to continue to improve as a parent. That doesn’t mean that you are not good at it now! It simply means that our youth need our best, so they can be their best. Keep growing and challenging yourself to adapt to their new needs.
My own boys are now in their early 20’s, so I’d appreciate you sending me an article on how the heck to parent them! =)
Click the link below to read how we can adjust our parenting as our kids get older.
Changing and Growing as Parents
Losing My Religion
Chad Diegle, Director of Youth Ministries
4/29/21
I wake up each morning, throw on my reading glasses (yeah, I’m getting old), and grab my phone to read the latest news from the previous day. This time keeps me, at least a little bit, updated on current events in our city, country, and world. A couple of weeks ago an article caught my attention because of its title: Losing My Religion. I had to open it.
The article is well written and also covers a topic that many of us have thought about over the past several years, and especially as we have lived out this pandemic. Please click the link below take a minute to read it. You may not agree with everything the author says, but I do see great value in giving it some thought.
Learning Patience
Chad Diegle, Director of Youth Ministries
3/8/21
A year ago, almost to the day, we found ourselves in a strange new pattern. Masks, distancing, hand sanitizer, and an odd lack of toilet paper were the easy signs of our new world. The more subtle signs took a little more time to manifest. Here are a few of my little indicators that life was going to be different. I received a letter from Arizona stating that I had filed for unemployment, which was false. Then a few months later Montana followed suit, yet I have never even stepped foot in Montana. Last month Kentucky also gave me the news. Of course, I spent the time to file my grievances and lock down my credit, but this was all a sign of unrest in our culture. People were showing their desperation and panic by stooping to new ways of finding stability financially . . . theft.
Another more subtle instance of our solitude creeping away at our psyche is the isolation. I am not yet sure of the impact of social distancing, but there is a price to pay. My fear is that our patience for others might deteriorate, or maybe our teens will lose their already frail ability to connect with peers in authentic relationships, or worse yet we simply become apathetic to the needs of others. Fear is such a temptation during times of stress.
My thoughts go to my source of peace. My thoughts go to my faith that our Creator gave us the tools to repair . . . and even to thrive during trials. My thoughts go to each of you, and my hope is that you too are able to seek these free gifts and blessings from our God. One word in particular has been on my heart and mind: patience. Please reflect on the verses below.
Philippians 4:6 – Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.
1 Corinthians 13:4 – Love is patient and kind; it is not jealous or conceited or proud; it is not arrogant.
Romans 12:12 – Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer.
I am being taught patience. I would guess that many of you feel the same way.
Peace.
In Service to Others
Chad Diegle, Director of Youth Ministries
2/8/21
“The best way to find yourself is to lose yourself in the service of others.”
–Mahatma Gandhi
Finding oneself is difficult. Finding oneself as a teenager during a pandemic…no thank you! Our teens are desperately seeking to discover who they are, where they fit in, what their purpose is, and why it all matters. Gandhi’s quote about finding yourself in the service of others is perfect. So often in our Western Culture we see our accomplishments, money, possessions, and authority as the path to understanding. Those things are not bad or wrong, but they certainly cannot answer the question of who we are or how to discover ourselves.
Serving others is not only a beautiful way to discover oneself, but it’s also a way to connect with our Creator and Lord. Jesus served with every breath, and his example should be a roadmap for our lives. I invite you to start your journey of self-discovery, of unveiling your true self, and start by offering more of you to others. It is a beautiful and rich journey.
The ELCA has many wonderful opportunities to get involved in service to the world. Click the link below to investigate some of the simple ways you can get started.
Talking Faith
Chad Diegle, Director of Youth Ministries
1/18/21
Parents, as you have conversations about faith at home, I want to share an article with you that I think has some value. I know firsthand that sharing our own faith and guiding our children in faith is extremely difficult. This article does a nice job of offering ideas on how to approach it in ways that your teen will likely appreciate.
Know that you are all in my prayers, as are your children. We are on this journey together. Click the link below to read the article.
Desert Cross Faith Formation 